


Two Hands Are Better Than None

by curi_o



Series: Pretty the World [1]
Category: Firefly
Genre: Content: Fluff, Content: Smut, Contrivances: Mates, F/M, Meta: Juvenilia, POV: Jayne Cobb, Sex: Oral, Warnings: Weird-Ass Sexing, content: hurt/comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-06
Updated: 2007-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-09 00:45:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/449372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curi_o/pseuds/curi_o
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jayne's in need of relief.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two Hands Are Better Than None

**Author's Note:**

> Pretty the World prompt: Aptitude
> 
> This is a really weird fic. That's pretty much the extent of it. Weirdness.

* * *

Jayne Cobb flopped down on his mattress with a huff. After a week of living like this, he was damn sure he’d take care not to draw the attention of those pulling the universal strings for a good while. It had been an entire week of not being able to lift a thing: not a fork nor a gun nor a weight nor a whetstone. If _two_ broken arms weren’t some kind of cosmic revenge, he didn’t know what would be.

They were just bitty fractures, too, is what Simon said. Bitty things always seemed to find a way of taking Jayne down: bullets, needles, wrenches, girls, _Mal_. Maybe he oughta just steer clear of the bitty things, kind of like that guy with the heel.

‘Course, some of them bitty things actually had a shiny to ‘em. Crazy, now, _she_ had a definite attractability about her. With them legs and the way she moved and that tight little body… 

At this point on any normal evening in his bunk, Jayne’s hand would have found its way to his fly for some quality introspective time.

Tonight, on the other hand (no pun intended): “ _Gorramit!_ ”

Here he was getting all hot and bothered and he couldn’t even take care of himself? How was a man supposed to live with that?

“You don't have to.”

* * *

The voice, hesitant, drifted down his ladder. Two pale feet, smooth and muscled legs, and an incredibly feminine torso followed.

Jayne’s forced his lids closed after that. If he didn’t see her, he told himself, she wasn’t there. _If he didn’t see her, she_ wasn’t _there_.

He jerked as River’s cool hand brushed over his forehead and cheeks. “I _am_ here,” she whispered, “and you _don’t_ have to live like this.”

Jayne’s voice came out dry and crackly. “You heard of a better option, woman?”

River’s hair trailed over his chest, tickling his sensitive nipples. “Sure I did,” she grinned. “Haven’t heard anything but for months.”

Her breath ghosted Jayne’s lips, and the prone mercenary involuntarily licked at the air, trying to taste River.

“Hasn’t been from me,” he breathed. “I ain’t said a word. Not one word to nobody.”

River snorted in his face. Jayne grinned. “But you aren’t talking about the words come out loud.”

The woman who had been leaning over Jayne’s form from the side of his bed suddenly moved to straddle his thighs. The big man groaned at the sensation of warmth so close to his erection and bent his knees upward, feet planted on the mattress, to slide River’s body directly over his pelvis.

“No.” Her voice was low as she leaned down. “I wasn’t.”

* * *

When she kissed him, Jayne thought he was flying. Then he remembered his current location and felt foolish. River’s hands in his hair, however, wiped all thoughts from his mind but those of her. If only his arms had been free, he could have held her in the way he’d dreamed so many lonely nights in the black.

“I don’t think this is good timing, girl. I ain’t gonna be able to treat you right for a good while here.” Jayne tried to muster a tone of authority to his voice, though the idea seemed ridiculous.

“You take care of me.” River repeated the sentiment she’d spoken to Simon on Mr. U’s moon. “My turn.”

With that, River Tam deftly maneuvered Jayne Cobb out of his trousers for the first time.

* * *

“Now just hold _on_ a second, Miz Antsy Pants.” Jayne found himself genuinely hesitant. That was unusual. “I ain’t never taken care of you, and I got no idea why you’d come here to take care of _me_.”

Maybe it was having his arms all bound up. That must have been it. He couldn’t get all grabby and stop using his brain altogether like he should if he couldn’t _grab_ anything. Stupid arms, being all breakable.

That thought brought to mind monkeys he’d seen on the Cortex—and once, as a kid, in a zoo—who ate with their feet and at the same time groomed on each other with their hands. Too bad he wasn’t one of them.

He didn’t need River’s astounded look to tell him that line of thought was completely irrelevant to the matter at hand. He flushed darkly and cleared his throat, trying to regain focus.

“Bi zui, Jayne,” River snapped. Her dark eyes were suddenly furious. “We will discuss our primate cousins later. You think you have not cared for me?” Jayne was breathless at River’s speedy transitions.

“Did you get two broken arms in a foolish attempt to protect and defend _Captain Daddy’s_ honor?”

Jayne snorted. “Mal ain’t got no honor to lose.”

River did not look as though she’d found his interjection humorous. She continued on her tirade. “Your thoughts have been of my health and happiness for 351 days, 8 hours, 49 minutes, and 31 seconds. I tried not to know, but denial is loud. Secrets are loud. Your want,” she added, resting a hand on the firm bulge in Jayne’s shorts, “is loudest of all.

“You tried to protect me from _you_.” River’s tone was incredulous. “You cannot damage me, Jayne Cobb.”

* * *

When River paused to take a breath, Jayne became hyper-aware of her body, which she’d somehow maneuvered to lie flat on his: her chin on his sternum, her pelvis against his, her legs on his. Her eyes’ sudden dilation matched his, and Jayne suppressed a moan.

Jayne drew another labored breath. “Might not be able to take you in a fight, true, but there’re plenty of ways you ain’t been damaged; I ain’t never gonna see you damaged. You need a man like yer brother, who understands that educated stuff and don’t have a streak of violence to him: a good man, all noble and honest and, you know, gentle.”

Even without River’s stinging slap across his face, Jayne might have flinched from the force of the emotions crossing hers. There’d been disbelief, amusement, hurt, anger bordering on uncontrolled rage, and underneath them all, a profound sadness.

* * *

She’d sat up and rolled off him, to the edge of his bunk. Her legs now dangled over it, her back decidedly to Jayne. He recognized the abandoned and hopeless feeling that took his gut at her absence; he’d long ago determined to accept that feeling as the normal state of affairs, though it was stronger now than it had ever been.

“All my life,” the brunette muttered, “ _men_ presuming to know my needs. _Men_ saying, ‘This is best, River. Go here, River. Do this, River. You mustn’t do that, River. Be proper, River. Be normal, River. _Behave_ , River. Kill him, River. Kill them, River. Run, River. Be still, River. Don’t scream, River. Smile like you enjoy it, River. Say my name, River. Call me ‘Master,’ River.’”

The young woman in question seemed to forget herself, her spine straight as Vera’s barrel, her hands and head trembling. A violent shiver returned her to Jayne’s bunk, and she swiveled, focusing pained eyes on the man.

“Don’t _presume_. It’s not in the spirit of the holiday. You think you know what you’re getting and destroy the surprise.”

* * *

Her words snapped Jayne’s mind back to Ariel. “Well, _I_ certainly ain’t no good for you. I’m too ancient and bitter, not changeable and fresh. I’ve survived by being selfish, and I’m gonna keep on being selfish,” he hissed. He wanted to slap some sense into the passion-filled young female in his bed before they _both_ lost their heads.

“That’s life, Jayne,” River said, empathy in her voice and eyes. “Life wants to keep on living. It looks out for itself. Every living thing cares only about its own health. Chimpanzees and cows and mothers and Companions and lovers. Love is good for me. That’s why I love you. It’s good for _me_.”

Jayne wondered if she’d somehow snuck a bomb into his chest, right around the area of his heart. “You love me? I ain’t for loving, little girl. You get that nonsense out of your head,” he ordered gruffly.

* * *

His mind was still reeling from the implications of River’s pronouncement when the woman in question climbed back onto his body.

“You should not lie to your mate, Jayne Cobb. Your mate knows your mind better than anyone else in the ‘verse.” To emphasize this declaration, River twisted Jayne’s right nipple painfully. He felt his penis twitch with pleasure under River’s own center.

“Who said _you’re_ my mate?” he grunted as the enigmatic female on his body licked a trail from his navel to his chin. She was getting to be distracting.

“It’s a foregone conclusion,” River intoned.

Jayne snorted defiantly. “Don’t need anyone but myself.”

* * *

At his pronouncement, River, in what seemed an unconsidered move, slid his shorts down his legs. Jayne was fast losing track of her movements. He couldn’t prop himself up to see her and was being overwhelmed by the sensations alone.

When Cra— the gi— Riv— ( _oh, hell_ ) Jayne’s _mate_ began kneading his legs, starting at calf level and working up to his thighs, the man who had tried it all and who prided himself on his stamina almost came.

River’s face popped into view above his. She grinned ferociously. “I know what you want, big man. Your thoughts flow through mine much as your seed will into my body.”

One of her hands (there was no way of knowing which, and Jayne was nearly beyond caring) ran playfully through his pubic hair while the other stroked his cheek. Though Jayne was tempted to let his eyes roll back in his head and surrender to the wild thing above him, he took a deep breath and forced himself to focus on her dark irises.

“I know what you want,” River repeated, “but I want something, too. _Tell_ me. Out loud. Like I’m a real woman.”

* * *

“You _are_ a real woman!” Jayne was indignant. A flash of uncertainty crossed River’s face. 

In that instant, the full meaning of her request became clear. Jayne was sure he had never been, nor never could be, harder in his life.

River smiled encouragingly. Jayne groaned. “This is unnatural, woman. I’m s’posed to be in charge, here. I’m the man. A real man. A _big_ man, with man-parts to prove it.”

River’s grin widened naughtily. She winked, then slid her body completely off his, making sure to remain out of contact with Jayne’s body. She was close enough, however, that Jayne could still _feel_ her in the atmosphere between them.

He squirmed without meaning to. _Stupid traitorous body_. He was positive River had noticed his reaction with pleasure. It was time to put a stop to this foolishness.

“Right, then. Off with them clothes.”

* * *

The trick was to keep her guessing. Sure, she could read his mind but, her aptitude with the skill aside, it wasn’t exactly a challenging feat. She’d said she knew what he wanted; so did every human being over the age of 16. That didn’t mean she knew what he’d do; and she couldn’t, so long as he kept his actions unplanned.

River was straddling his torso, now, as she pulled the stretchy dress from her frame, her eyes seductively locked with his.

“Slow it down some, princess.” River’s confident expression faded for an instant. “I want to remember this,” Jayne explained.

The relief on her features reminded the older male of his mate’s youth and innocence. Jayne felt a pang of guilt; when River’s fluid movement stuttered for an instant, it was replaced with full-force anxiety.

“Stop,” Jayne demanded. His voice was barely a whisper. “You sure you want this, River? I mean, you sure you want it to be like this? It should be slow and sweet and soft and I should be taking care of you, not ordering you arou—“

“I should go,” River interrupted. “You’re clearly not ready.”

* * *

Jayne was silent as River got to her feet and adjusted the material that hid her skin. This was about _her_ inexperience, not his. She hadn’t been in any relationships her whole time on Serenity. Jayne had been with whores even _after_ he’d started thinking on River.

It came to him from somewhere hidden in the most out-of-reach place of his consciousness: River was right. Of course she was right. It wasn’t about the sexing. Jayne was always ready for _sex_. It was the other word: “relationship.”

She thought he wasn’t ready for a relationship? Hell, hadn’t he been thinking on her for 351 days and however long?

“Woman, you stop right there.”

River looked at Jayne hesitantly.

The man whom nothing intimidated swallowed hard. _It’s now or not at all, big fella._

“I believe I told you to take off them clothes.”

* * *

River beamed. Jayne’s stomach did unnatural, but somehow pleasant, things in response.

The lithe young woman gripped the fabric at her hips and slowly pulled it up, not breaking eye contact with the man she’d just claimed. As first her thighs, then panties and stomach were revealed, Jayne’s eyes widened and River grew more confident. She moved slower still, allowing Jayne to savor each new bit he saw. By the time she pulled the fabric over her breasts, hidden by a startlingly sexy black bra, Jayne was salivating.

As River raised her arms to slide the garment over her head, she pivoted slowly, giving Jayne a chance to appreciate the supple muscles along her spine.

“That’s real good, princess,” Jayne purred. “Absolutely perfect. But I’m getting impatient and you’re still half-dressed.” Jayne cocked an eyebrow. “Go.”

River stripped her underwear and bra in record time.

* * *

“That’s my baby. _Mine_ ,” Jayne breathed in awe, admiring the sight of a fully nude River Tam, live and waiting for his instruction.

“Okay, girl. Back on the bed. This time, I want you to set that nice, tasty core of yours right over my mouth.” He held River’s gaze, silently affirming his statement. “Move faster, princess.”

The next thing Jayne Cobb saw was a mass of black curls at the apex of River’s legs.

* * *

Jayne buried his face in River’s hair and breathed deep. “Woman,” he groaned, “you are like nothing in this universe.”

When he planted the first kiss directly on her clitoris, River jerked, bouncing into Jayne’s nose.

“Ow!”

“Sorry,” whispered River sheepishly.

In response, Jayne found the tiny bit of flesh that had prompted such a strong response from his woman and worried it with his teeth, causing River to squirm as her breathing became more rapid. If he’d had his hands, he could reach up and part the wiry black strands in his face, gaining access to a part of River of which he’d only dreamed.

As it was, Jayne found himself murmuring, “Princess, I need you to bring your hands down here and find me a way through this territory.”

River, who’d been leaning forward, forearms supporting her, shifted slightly before complying with Jayne’s instruction. As her fingers brushed through her hair and against his face, Jayne licked them, amazed at the smooth quality of her skin and freshness of her scent and flavor.

He followed the path her hand made with his nose and lips, his face already moist with River’s arousal. The moment his skin alighted against her folds, Jayne let out a relieved puff of breath.

(When he relived that moment in a few hours, he would wonder if he should feel guilty for needing the physical connection to feel safe with River. In later conversations, he and River would both realize that they each found intimacy deeply connected with their bodily experiences.)

For now, Jayne basked in the security of their bodies’ connection. As River moved to withdraw her hands, Jayne tilted his head back and grunted, “Touch yourself.”

Now, as River rubbed at her clitoris, Jayne returned to the warm, wet place he’d begun to think of as home. He licked along the crevice, briefly slipping his tongue further inside.

River’s breathing grew more labored, punctuated by tiny panting noises.

“Don’t make a sound, woman,” Jayne ordered. “You so much as squeak, and I’m going to send you into the biggest, loudest heaven you’ve never dreamed.”

“Jayne,” River breathed.

“Right, then,” Jayne grinned. “Here we go.”

“No. No, wait.”

* * *

“What? What is it?” Jayne was terrified as he tried to find River’s face. What had he done wrong?

“I shouldn’t go alone. This a journey for us, together.” 

Her face nuzzled his as she licked his lips, then thrust her tongue between them. Her bare breasts now rubbed against his chest, her wet thighs and pubic hair against his pulsing erection.

Just as quickly as her mouth had appeared it was gone, replaced once again by dark, sticky curls. When Jayne thrust his tongue into her, intent on mimicking her kiss, his heart nearly stopped. River was licking at his balls like they were a pair of ice planets she was determined to subdue. 

He and River both froze, though he thought he could feel the pulse in her tongue against his sensitive skin. Jayne moved his mouth and whispered, “I wasn’t going to ask—I mean, you don’t have to—“

River silenced him by nibbling along the underside of his erection from root to tip.

* * *

What followed was a blur of sensation. As Jayne explored River’s depths with his nose and mouth, decades of experience bolstered his confidence. He found the reassurance more comforting than he might've expected. This was all so new—and she was a virgin—and this needed to be right—and she'd just gone for that!

He was going to come, but she was going to go first, gorrammit. He moved his tongue faster as his girl began to shudder around him and still faster as she closed her mouth tight around his shaft, pulling hard in her fervor.

Jayne squeezed his eyes shut tight and held his breath until River jackknifed against him. In the next moment he'd let go, groaning deep into her body.

* * *

River and Jayne held their positions for a few moments as they regained their breath. Eventually, River reoriented her body—careful of Jayne's broken arms—once again straddling his thighs. She pulled Jayne’s blanket around her shoulders as she slid into place, her head against his heartbeat, her hands cradling his face.

Before she drifted into a satisfied sleep, River raised her head to peer into Jayne’s eyes. “We are mated, now,” she asserted with a note of satisfaction.

Jayne chuckled. “Not quite, princess. But soon,” he assured her, and she leaned down to kiss him.


End file.
